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returntothepit >> discuss >> guys i need to pass a quick-cup drug test by reimroc on Aug 7,2009 10:28am
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toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 10:28am edited Aug 7,2009 10:41am
Not a lab test so I figure its easier to beat. Its on of those home drug tests you can buy at CVS. Anyone have any experience with these? What do you recommend I should do to pass it? I hear just flushing will beat these quick cups every time no matter how dirty you are. Thanks for the help.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 10:37am edited Aug 7,2009 10:38am
Is someone watching you piss while you do it or? If you piss just a minute amount into it and dilute the rest with hot water, so that it gives it just enough urine color, you're set.



toggletoggle post by The_Rooster  at Aug 7,2009 10:37am
Are you the one buying the test? Will you be doing it at home without someone watching?

If the answer to the above questions is yes, than the answer is easy... Have a non-pot-smoker piss for you.

Otherwise, maybe just drink a SHITLOAD of H2O in hopes that it will travel through your system quickly enough and you'll end up just pissing clean water. I've heard this works, but don't have any personal experience.

I know there are solutions out there that you can drink, but if you go that route, read up on them, because some piss tests can pick up on that.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 10:39am
mikeofdecrepitude said[orig][quote]
Is someone watching you piss while you do it or? If you piss just a minute amount into it and dilute the rest with hot water, so that it gives it just enough urine color, you're set.


no i can piss in peace BUT the person administering the test will be standing outside listening for the flushing of the toilet or the running of the faucet.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 10:39am
GNC also sells those detox drinks, I know people who've used them and they work. I think you have to drink them a couple of hours before the test though.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 10:41am
this test isn't to test for THC. its to test for opiates. yes opiates get out of your system quicker but i've used basically every day for the past two weeks and i know if i do nothing i will fail if i get tested tonight or tomorrow.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 10:42am
This is a scumbag move but if you have a kid (that isn't a teenager on drugs) or a sxe friend, have them piss in something like a plastic pouch for you and pour it into the cup.



toggletoggle post by SkinSandwich at Aug 7,2009 10:43am
reimroc said[orig][quote]
this test isn't to test for THC. its to test for opiates. yes opiates get out of your system quicker but i've used basically every day for the past two weeks and i know if i do nothing i will fail if i get tested tonight or tomorrow.


Hook a brother up with some opiates!!



toggletoggle post by The_Rooster  at Aug 7,2009 10:43am
You should probably stop using opiates.



toggletoggle post by Yeti at Aug 7,2009 10:44am
The_Rooster said[orig][quote]
Otherwise, maybe just drink a SHITLOAD of H2O in hopes that it will travel through your system quickly enough and you'll end up just pissing clean water. I've heard this works, but don't have any personal experience.


it does work, i've witnessed it. this dude had to take a piss test for court and i would smoke with him the night before, he would drink water to the point of a toxic level, and pass every time.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 10:44am
Yeah, but who wants to go that route?



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 10:44am
i don't have a kid i AM the kid on drugs(well im 22 but i act like i'm 12 sometimes haha) and i need to beat my parent's drug test otherwise i am homeless.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 10:44am
^ responding to rooster



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 10:46am
i'm thinking i can also go to headlines in nashua and hopefully be able to buy fake urine. that is if they sell it.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 10:47am
This just reminded me of Abscesses Urine Junkies.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 10:51am
Sucks you can't get high without the hassle, man. I've never had to do any of the above mentioned, not even a piss test for a job. Good luck, and if you're doing opiates on the reg, ease up!



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 10:53am
i guess other than flushing my only option is to find a headshop in mass/new hampshire and buy fake piss. i have no clue where any head shops are and if they do or don't.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 10:53am
where jimbo when you need him with his urban shaman knowledge.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 10:54am
It's sketchy but do you have any friends not on drugs that are willing to accept money for their piss? Your money is as green as everyone elses.



toggletoggle post by XmikeX at Aug 7,2009 10:56am
I'll sell you some straightedge urine cheap.



toggletoggle post by SacInDartmouth at Aug 7,2009 11:02am
Get some fruit pectin, mix in a pouch with a huge bottle of gatorade and chug it 2 to 3 hours before your test. Fill up the gatorade bottle with water once or twice and drink that until your test. About an hour and a half before take some B vitamins or a complex B&C combination to get some yellow back.

Worked fine for me and cost like $7.



toggletoggle post by Greeny at Aug 7,2009 11:05am
I don't do drugs. You shouldn't either or you wouldn't have to worry about that



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:05am
where the hell do i find fruit pectin?



toggletoggle post by SacInDartmouth at Aug 7,2009 11:07am
any grocery store. it's used to make jello and shit. from what i understand it bonds to fatty cells and envelopes them. THC gets metabolized out if your body in fat cells so the pectin helps mask them from a quick cup test. Mine may have even been a lab test and I still passed.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:08am
this test isn't to find THC though.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 11:08am
Greeny said[orig][quote]
I don't do drugs. You shouldn't either


LOL
Fascist.



toggletoggle post by GUY at Aug 7,2009 11:09am
reimroc said[orig][quote]
where the hell do i find fruit pectin?


whole foods will have it..i work there i know



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:10am
i will try that but in all honesty i will feel the most safe going to a head shop and buying fake piss. anyone know of one in mass/nh that sells that stuff?



toggletoggle post by SacInDartmouth at Aug 7,2009 11:10am
reimroc said[orig][quote]
this test isn't to find THC though.


What's it for? And when was the last time you indulged?



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:13am
opiates and this morning before work.



toggletoggle post by SacInDartmouth at Aug 7,2009 11:14am
hahahahahahaha. drink water til you're blind man.



toggletoggle post by xitsdoomsdayx at Aug 7,2009 11:17am
cranberryjuce and about a gallon of water you should be set



toggletoggle post by SacInDartmouth at Aug 7,2009 11:17am
Do you a have a script for vicodin or anything?

You could fuck yourself up and go to the hospital complaining about pain. Even if they give you a bottle of like 20 it'd be enough to explain why opiates in your system and they couldn't give you shit for it.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:17am
hahaha just wanted to make sure that would actually work. like i said i've used every day for the past two weeks so if i do nothing i would definitely fail if tested tonight or tomorrow.



toggletoggle post by SacInDartmouth at Aug 7,2009 11:18am
xitsdoomsdayx said[orig][quote]
cranberryjuce and about a gallon of water you should be set


people only use cranberry juice because it's a diuretic. it has no difference from H20 in that aspect.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:22am edited Aug 7,2009 11:25am
SacInDartmouth said[orig][quote]
Do you a have a script for vicodin or anything?

You could fuck yourself up and go to the hospital complaining about pain. Even if they give you a bottle of like 20 it'd be enough to explain why opiates in your system and they couldn't give you shit for it.


no. i don't. i use heroin, a drug my parents weren't exactly happy about when they found a couple needles in my room a month ago. like i stated in another thread i was clean for a good two years until i relapsed and got caught. hence why i'm getting not-so-randmly tested and hence why i made this thread.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:33am
i guess you can call me a "functioning addict" as i was able to keep my nice administration career at my exchange hosting company during my relapse and the past two weeks.



toggletoggle post by C.dEAd at Aug 7,2009 1:13pm
Pee a slight amount into the cup and fill the rest with toilet water. Worked for a friend of mine. Good luck.



toggletoggle post by boarcorpsejimbo   at Aug 7,2009 1:23pm
1.) (if you can afford it, and you REALLY don't wanna fail) go to buried treasures on Haviland st. right by berklee downtown boston. They sell a drink called VALE that i used every week for a long time, and never stopped smoking... it works great.

2.) (if you don't wanna spend money) This sounds crazy, but if you drink enough water before hand, your piss dillutes so much that you can't detect anything in it. With a lab test this method comes back "inconclusive" and usually just buys you a day or two to get a drink (see option 1) but with a storebought test it will work every time. Make sure you start drinking water heavily a couple hours before so that you can piss a couple times.... i know this sounds too simple to be true, but i guarantee it works.

*Just so you know to take me seriously, i've had upwards of 100 drug tests in my life, and only failed the ones that i didn't use one of these methods for.



toggletoggle post by boarcorpsejimbo   at Aug 7,2009 1:25pm
the toilet water is a bad idea, most of those tests have thermometers on them, and they'll be able to tell if it's not warm enough. One of the places i was tested at even watched you pee in the cup, and then held it in their hands to make sure it felt warm enough.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 1:34pm edited Aug 7,2009 1:35pm
boarcorpsejimbo said[orig][quote]
1.) (if you can afford it, and you REALLY don't wanna fail) go to buried treasures on Haviland st. right by berklee downtown boston. They sell a drink called VALE that i used every week for a long time, and never stopped smoking... it works great.

2.) (if you don't wanna spend money) This sounds crazy, but if you drink enough water before hand, your piss dillutes so much that you can't detect anything in it. With a lab test this method comes back "inconclusive" and usually just buys you a day or two to get a drink (see option 1) but with a storebought test it will work every time. Make sure you start drinking water heavily a couple hours before so that you can piss a couple times.... i know this sounds too simple to be true, but i guarantee it works.

*Just so you know to take me seriously, i've had upwards of 100 drug tests in my life, and only failed the ones that i didn't use one of these methods for.



Thanks jimbo. I've had 100 drug tests too while i was on probation/drug court for 2 years. those were lab tests and anyone who tried to beat them always got caught. Yea like i said this is one of those "first check home drug tests" that you can buy at any drug store. I heard these can be beat fairly easily i just had no clue how much water and for how long i need to flush for. right now i am pissing pretty much clear and pissing about every 20 minutes or so. i don't know if thats the right area or i need to be pissing every 5 minutes or what. lol i don't even know if pissing every 5 minutes is possible.



toggletoggle post by boarcorpsejimbo   at Aug 7,2009 2:30pm
If you're drinking that much water, you should be fine. But if you wanna be sure, just get the drink i mentioned.

Just so you know, you can't totally flush yourself out with water. Most of the drugs you would be tested for are stored in your fat cells. The reason the water works is because you dillute your piss at that time, not so much that you flush yourself out. Even those crazy 48 hour teas don't really "flush" you out, they really just cover up what's in you. (through high levels of creatine and other stuff) So as long as you're drinking a shit load of water at the time of your test, and you've pissed at least a couple times in the 20min before that, you should be fine. Just think about it like this, the more water you drink, the lower the percentage of drugs in your pee. But later when you stop drinking so much water, it will go back up again. So just make sure you dillute the hell outta it the day of.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 2:45pm edited Aug 7,2009 2:45pm
yea i hear ya. its opiates they're looking for so i should be good even though i have used every day for the past two weeks.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 2:46pm
reimroc, I also recommend getting a steady job and moving out. Problem solved.



toggletoggle post by arilliusbm  at Aug 7,2009 2:50pm
drink lots of water and eat lotsa asparagus



toggletoggle post by boarcorpsejimbo   at Aug 7,2009 3:00pm
mikeofdecrepitude said[orig][quote]
reimroc, I also recommend getting a steady job and moving out. Problem solved.


true... not really the nicest way to put it, but true.



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 3:30pm
Life isn't nice, and I think reimroc gets that loud and clear.



toggletoggle post by boarcorpsejimbo   at Aug 7,2009 3:32pm
I agree. I wasn't even saying that i wouldn't put it that way. I was more or less saying what your last post did.
( post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 3:30pm

Life isn't nice, and I think reimroc gets that loud and clear. )



toggletoggle post by mikeofdecrepitude at Aug 7,2009 3:37pm
Yeah, I mean this dude is booting up, so he's already in a rough spot. The throes of addiction are extremely hard to overcome. The harsh reality of existence is staring him right in the face, and it sucks because when you cross that line, you know you can only blame yourself.



toggletoggle post by dertoxia   at Aug 7,2009 3:39pm
boarcorpsejimbo said[orig][quote]
the more water you drink, the lower the percentage of drugs in your pee.


simple and to the point...this should be the catch-all answer whenever one of these threads pops up



toggletoggle post by moe nli at Aug 7,2009 3:57pm
boarcorpsejimbo said[orig][quote]
mikeofdecrepitude said[orig][quote]
reimroc, I also recommend getting a steady job and moving out AND GETTING THE CHRIST OFF HEROIN. Problem solved.


true... not really the nicest way to put it, but true.



toggletoggle post by drug test passer at Aug 7,2009 6:30pm
I don't know if someone already posted this but it's easy and it works. I had to pass a drug test for my job and I smoked two days before I took it. All I did was drink tons of water and piss a lot. But you have to take multi vitamins so your piss is yellow. I took 2.5 of the big ones in the few hours before the test. Make sure you piss a ton and piss a little before you piss in the cup.



toggletoggle post by GUY at Aug 7,2009 7:50pm
patiently waiting for results



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 9:14pm
well i passed. the second line came up a bit faded which means its a pass. how the test works is that theres one line under each of the drugs being tested if the second line shows up either bold or slightly faded its a pass, if it doesn't show up then its a fail.

so i passed. pissed myself silly all day to be safe.



toggletoggle post by GUY at Aug 7,2009 9:52pm
kid ya got get off the junk man, its bad news.....try your best for all the people who love you



toggletoggle post by xanonymousx at Aug 7,2009 10:07pm
dude, do what you want, but my cousin ODed on this shit in October he was 28.
Get help, even if you don't want too, just do it man.



toggletoggle post by MillenialKingdom  at Aug 7,2009 10:26pm
Drugs are bad, mmmk?



toggletoggle post by IllinoisEnemaBradness at Aug 7,2009 10:42pm
what would Wilford Brimley do?



toggletoggle post by Hoser at Aug 7,2009 10:57pm
How about you just stop being a doped up loser and live a clean life? I've been doing it forever and I pass every time.



toggletoggle post by arilliusbm  at Aug 7,2009 11:02pm






toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:03pm
Hoser said[orig][quote]
How about you just stop being a doped up loser and live a clean life? I've been doing it forever and I pass every time.


Because part of me enjoys being a functioning addict. The other part knows it can't stay that way forever. I've been sober for a good amount of time in the past like i said earlier in this thread. I know I can do it again. Its just beyond difficult to pull yourself up after you slip and have a relapse. Especially when you run with it.



toggletoggle post by Hoser at Aug 7,2009 11:06pm
I was just trying to get a rise out of you and I failed miserably.

Seriously, good luck man. I have never done any of that shit, but I have friends that do...wish I had some better advice.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:09pm
mikeofdecrepitude said[orig][quote]
reimroc, I also recommend getting a steady job and moving out. Problem solved.


Oh and I have a steady job. Been in my career as a database administrator for a little over a year at an exchange hosting company. Luckily after my relapse I continued to be a "functioning addict" and didn't do anything to fuck that job up. I've actually been able to keep my use a secret to everyone I know except for my family who immediately knew i relapsed a couple days after it happened.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:10pm
Hoser said[orig][quote]
I was just trying to get a rise out of you and I failed miserably.

Seriously, good luck man. I have never done any of that shit, but I have friends that do...wish I had some better advice.


Calling me a drugged up loser isn't going to make me get clean again lol. I appreciate you tying but in the end its up to me to light a fire under my ass and get sober again.



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 7,2009 11:23pm
I will get clean again. I need to get myself over that fence. Looking back my life wasn't more fantastic when I was clean and sober for two year but as a person and a being I felt amazing. I do want that again.



toggletoggle post by Pires at Aug 8,2009 1:00am
reimroc said[orig][quote]
I will get clean again. I need to get myself over that fence. Looking back my life wasn't more fantastic when I was clean and sober for two year but as a person and a being I felt amazing. I do want that again.


you have to do it for yourself, first and foremost. And then your family. As shitty as that sounds, if you don't fully want help, it wont work. I know you want to be clean because you said it and it's easier said than done, but it is worth it. You've already got a good job and you shouldn't let drug use get in the way. Plus, you don't want to lose your family over this shit. Look how close you were just now because of smack. Good luck man.



toggletoggle post by Archaeon at Aug 8,2009 1:14am
DO METH OR YOURE A PUSSY



toggletoggle post by sever at Aug 8,2009 6:10am
POST INSENSITIVE REPLIES ON INTERNET MESSAGE BOARDS TO ENLARGE YOUR E-PENIS OR YOURE A PUSSY



toggletoggle post by sxealex   at Aug 8,2009 9:07am
DO A GAY LITTLE DANCE OR YOU'RE A FAGGOT



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 8,2009 11:31am
*GAY LITTLE DANCE*



toggletoggle post by neverpurified  at Aug 8,2009 11:37am
IllinoisEnemaBradness said[orig][quote]
what would Wilford Brimley do?


he'd check his blood sugar.... he'd check it often



toggletoggle post by SkinSandwich at Aug 8,2009 1:28pm
I am on 80 mgs of Oxycontin right now. i think I will run around and clean absolutely every nick and cranny of my house, yeah baby!!!



toggletoggle post by reimroc at Aug 8,2009 1:31pm
you do that skin, you do that. =P



toggletoggle post by SkinSandwich at Aug 8,2009 1:35pm
The dust bunnies think they can hide but I have the contin vision on my nilla!!!!!



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