So I finally got a fuckin job, and there is a drug screening....gotta get clean...but for those who can't stay away from smoke, I have a decent alternative. Maybe not for everyone but works for me.

Ideal in a shisha hookah or vaporizer.

95% shisha/tobacco

These amounts are dependent on what you want to use
2.5% white sage (let soak in shisha for about 30 min.)
2.5% sweet grass (also let soak for 30 min.)

If you have no sweet grass, 5% white sage will do.

Shisha: soak, then proceed traditionally.
Vaporizer: use regular loose pipe tobacco and dry herbs, set a bit lower than usual and vape it up.

Relaxing as fuck.

What, Bestial Onslaught hiring?

random screening or intitial screening?
either way, violation of your rights

HAHAHAHA YES! No man, I got a job as an auto auction driver. Just confirmed today. Very psyched to be making XBox 360 dollars.

Not random at all, it's initial and I have about a week. Link me to where it's a violation of my rights to have someone drug screen me.

Regardless, I'm going to be smoking/vaping this mix til then, and I'm also prepared with a set of Quick Tabs.

Banana peels FTW

haha, I don't know if it's "written down" anywhere as a violation of rights, but I do know that more and more companies are waiving that idea only because it costs too much money to follow through with. I personally think it's a violation of rights, but should only be used IF someone shows up to the job messed up. people should be free to do what they want to do, as long as it doesn't affect their life in a negative way. my 2 cents

also, you're screwed if it's a hair test.

I totally agree with your two cents. But, it is what it is. Time to play the gaaaaaaaame.

edit: Yup, gonna be screwed if it's a hair test, but I don't think so. Either way, best to get as clean as possible before the test.

DYA: Hehe....I love that prank

They did that to me (HAIR, LOL), and somehow it didn't come up with shit. I was maybe 3 months unweeded at the time, which supposedly is under the 6 months or so that tests for. *shrug* YMMV.

that is an intersting mix. I'd sprinkle a little salvia in there as well. My 3 cents.

wow this sounds good

cody shaves his head. ain't no way they can get his hair.

shave your whole body and tell them you are a competitive swimmer in your spare time.

HAHA! If I do that, it's gonna be REBIRTH OF SASQUATCH over here!

Although, this is for a job. I won't rule it out.

"I thought God shaved your head!"

"He does, but he leaves the sides, Mr. Wisenheimer."


Yeah, me too, so they took armpits and chesticles. If that's a no go, you effectively just fail the test, so that doesn't help. (Apparently they're not allowed to ask for, or use, pubes.)

does that mean if someone has alopecia and is completely devoid of hair, they fail the test and are denied employment?

I'm sure you could get some sort of Social Security-type exception. I don't know that they give out wikked br00tal passes, though.

UPDATE: For the herbs to add to the tobacco: USE A GRINDER.

I cannot stress that enough. Otherwise you will get a big gulp of harsh ass smoke and you'll say "This ain't SHIT"

Most employers will just not consider a person who says that for a job.

Obviously. But I just think it's discrimination unless blantantly obvious. Just like how you're not supposed to go to work drunk. A lot of people drink, but don't show up to work drunk. same rule should apply to everything else.

my whole concept is that I think people should be free to do what they want outside of work, but during work, it shouldn't fly (that is, depending on what you do.)
any substance that impairs cognition shouldn't be acceptable in a work-environment, but why screen beforehand? that just tells me that they ASSUME the person is irresponsible. it's an insult I tell ya

Yes, Jim. OBVIOUSLY I would not go to work stoned. It's not my time I'm on.
Also, this job isn't what I expected pay wise. I will NOT be making XBOX 360 dollars :( This is better than nothing though (I have applied a multitude of places with no call backs and when I call them they give me the whole "um........we'll call you if we are interested........are you done?.......then stop bothering me!")

A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away, I've bagged groceries under the influence before. Wasn't the brightest thing to do at a young ripe age. I know plenty of people that do stuff before and/or during work - not sure how they pull that off.

i wouldn't do it at just any job. when i worked in the dungeon of Norton Company i wouldn't have dared do something like that.

Oh I know what you're saying and I agree, but I also understand why it's done the way it is.

There's really no way around it unless it's deemed as an invasion of privacy. But there's really no other way to filter out the people that are indeed 'irresponsible.'

I sent Cody's prospective employer this thread as his drug test. He got an F+.

Especially since a lot of drug users and alcoholics are functional users.

I can always count on you to back me up. Friends for life.