O.K HERE'S THE STORY.....
Body: I'M ONLY GOING TO WRITE THIS ONCE SO DO NOT ASK ME ANY MORE ABOUT IT-THOSE OF YOU WHO I KNOW PERSONALLY I WILL GIVE YOU THE FULL STORY WHEN I SEE YOU....


I FEEL IT'S TIME TO LET ALL MY FRIENDS KNOW A LITTLE ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED OVER IN POLAND.....
FIRST OFF I WAS SICK BEFORE I EVEN WENT ON TOUR AND THE PLANE RIDE OVER I STARTED FEELING WORSE-THEN THE FERRY RIDE TO ENGLAND I GOT SICK ON-THEN BEING ON THE BUS WITH AROUND 20 PEOPLE DIDN'T HELP ME GET ANY SLEEP-LOTS OF PARTYING,ETC GOING ON BUT I DIDN'T DO TOO MUCH OF THAT-MAINLY JUST DRANK A LITTLE AND WATCHED MOVIES....
THERE WERE NO DAYS OFF TO GET ANY REST AND I WAS GETTING SICKER EVERYDAY WITH NO MEDICINE UNTIL 12 DAYS INTO THE TOUR-UPON GETTING TO POLAND I WAS IN THE WORSE CONDITION YET AND MY THROAT WAS REALLY FUCKED UP SO I DIDN'T WANT TO CONTINUE PLAYING....THERE WAS SOME OTHER BULLSHIT GOING ON AMONG OTHER THINGS WITH SOME CERTAIN 2-FACED PIECES OF SHIT INVOLVED WITH THE TOUR SO TO MAKE A LONG STORY SHORT I DECIDED TO LEAVE AND GO HOME BECAUSE OTHERWISE I WAS GOING TO CHECK INTO A HOSPITAL-EITHER WAY I WOULD HAVE HAD TO CANCEL SHOWS AND TO AVOID ALL THE HASSLE I THOUGHT IT WAS BEST TO GET BACK HOME......NOW I HAD A SITUATION WITH A TAXI DRIVER OVER THERE WHICH I'M NOT GOING TO GET INTO ON HERE-MY CLOSE BROTHERS AND SISTERS THAT I LOVE AND TRUST WITH MY LIFE ARE GETTING THE REAL STORY BUT LET'S JUST SAY THAT I WAS FACED WITH A LIFE OR DEATH SITUATION AND I HAD TO REACT THE ONLY WAY I CAN-NOW THOSE OF YOU THAT KNOW ME WELL(NOT THE OTHER STUPID IDIOTIC MOTHERFUCKERS OUT THERE THAT HIDE BEHIND THEIR COMPUTERS AND TALK SHIT) KNOW THAT I DON'T GO AROUND STABBING PEOPLE FOR NOTHING-IF ANYTHING I USE MY FISTS FIRST(IKE THE SAME MOTHERFUCKERS THAT LIKE TO TALK SHIT DON'T KNOW HOW TO DO).
I TOOK OVER THE CAB AND TRIED TO GET TO THE BORDER OF GERMANY BUT THERE WAS ROADBLOCKS EVERYWHERE SO I LEFT THE CAB AND WENT INTO THE WOODS-WHICH THE POLICE FAILED TO CATCH ME AFTER ABOUT 5-6 HRS-SO I CAME OUT AFTER THEY DISPERSED AND HAD THE TRCK STOP CASHIER CALL THE POLICE AND I TURNED MYSELF IN-THAT'S WHEN THE NIGHTMARE STARTED.....
O.K. NOW I WAS PUT THROUGH SOME MENTAL TORTURE THE FIRST FEW DAYS AND THEY COULDN'T BREAK ME AT ALL AND THEY WERE PISSED OFF CAUSE OF THAT-I WAS MOVED AROUND TO 3 DIFFERENT JAILS AND EACH ONE WAS THE SAME-I ONLY HAD 1 INCIDENT WITH SOME PRISONERS WHO TURNED OUT TO BE SOME OF THE BIGGEST PUSSIES I EVER ENCOUNTERED(I LOVE HOW IT HAS TO TAKE 5-10 IDIOTS TO TRY TO GET ME-THAT'S REAL TOUGH)-BUT ANYWAY THEY FAILED,THE PIECES OF SHIT PRISON GUARDS FAILED TO BREAK ME-I REVERSED THEIR WHOLE MENTAL TORTURE SHIT ON THEM AND TAUNTED THE HELL OUT OF SOME OF THEM.
AS FAR AS THESE FUCKING PUSSY-MOTHERFUCKING SHIT-TALKING FAGGOTS ON BLABBERMOUTH.COM WHO THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO GET RAPED,BEAT OR LEFT TO ROT OVER THERE-I JUST GOT ONE THING TO SAY:I'M BACK MOTHERFUCKERS AND NONE OF YOU FAGGOTS WOULD HAVE EVER MADE IT OUT OF THERE ALIVE-YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONES WALKING AROUND IN DRESSES AND SUCKING DICK OR YOU WOULD HAVE KILLED YOURSELVES OUT OF FEAR SINCE YOU'RE ALL REALLY SUCH PUSSIES TO BEGIN WITH-YOU CLAIM TO KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT THE JAIL OVER THERE? WELL GUESS WHAT ASSHOLES-I ENDED UP MAKING ALOT OF CONNECTIONS OVER THERE DUE TO ME BEING PART POLISH AND UKRANIAN ON TOP OF BEING GERMAN,ITALIAN,IRISH SO MAYBE ONE DAY AFTER I FIND OUT WHO YOU ARE SINCE I CAN GET YOUR INFO THEN MAYBE YOU MIGHT BE SUFFERING EXACTLY WHAT YOU WISHED UPON ME ONE DAY EITHER HERE OR THERE WHEREVER FUCKING MISERABLE PLACE YOU LIVE SO YOU ALL BETTER HAVE EYES IN BACK OF YOUR HEADS CAUSE YOU'LL NEVER KNOW WHEN IT'S COMING-YOU SEE I'M OUT FREE WITH ALL CHARGES DROPPED(NEVER THOUGHT IT WOULD HAPPEN HUH DICKHEADS SO YOU TOOK ADVANTAGE TO TALK ALL YOUR SHIT WHILE I WAS LOCKED UP)
SO OBVIOUSLY I HAVE ALOT MORE CONNECTIONS AND SHIT GOING ON IN MY LIFE YOU'LL NEVER IMAGINE SO I WARN YOU NOW I'M NOT THE PERSON YOU WANT TO BE FUCKING WITH NOWADAYS CAUSE I REALLY DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT DOING WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO PROTECT MYSELF,FAMILY,WOMAN AND MY N.Y.D.M. BROTHERS AND SISTERS....

NOW ONTO LIGHTER THINGS:
I REALLY WANT TO THANK EVERYONE WHO HAS PRAYED,SUPPORTED,DONATED,HAD BENEFITS FOR ME AND JUST STOOD BY ME FOR THIS WHOLE ORDEAL ESPECIALLY MY FAMILY(WHO REALLY DID ALL THEY CAN TO GET ME OUT OF THERE),ELENA(FOR ALL THE PATIENCE,LOVE AND SUPPORT-I LOVE YO!!)MY N.Y.D.M BROTHERHOOD(YOU REALLY SHOWED ME WHAT TRUE BROTHERS AND SISTERS ARE AND I LOVE YOU ALL ETERNALLY),BIKER 81F FOR THE UNDYING LOVE AND SUPPORT,CRIMSON(C.T.D.M.),GREG(L.I.D.M.),AND MALIGNANCY FOR THROWING THE BENEFITS FOR ME AND MY CLOSE FRIENDS WHO HELPED OUT IN ANY WAY....YOU ALL GAVE ME THE WILL TO SURVIVE THOSE SHITHOLES OVER THERE AND SHOWED ME WHAT REAL BROTHERS,SISTERS AND FRIENDS YOU REALLY ARE!!!
I'M BACK NOW 2006 AND IT'S GOING TO BE A FUCKING BRUTAL YEAR!!!!
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO EVERYONE AND I'LL SEE AND THANK YOU ALL SOON ENOUGH!!
WILL-N.Y.D.M. INTERNATIONAL PRESIDENT-2006

wow, that's a sick adventure.

Will rules.

Damn, thats crazy.

So Will is going to use his Polish prison connections to find out who anonymous 14 year olds are on the internet and track them down and get them raped?

I wish I had an answer for this, but after reading that, my head hurts.
I think my only comment shall be "why is it funny that a deathmetal dude who writes lyrics like 'cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuunnnnnnnnnnnntttttttt' is happy that people prayed for him?"
no jesus no beast.

Will Rahmer for President

I think I'm the only one who thinks this guy sounds even more retarded after hearing his explanation.

menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:

I agree with you. I can't say for sure since I've never been there, but I bet that Poland has hospitals. Also, I met Will Rahmer before, I don't think he out psyched polish prison guards or beat down 5-10 (how did he lose track) other prisoners who wanted him dead for no reason, but turned out to be pussies who probably were never able to out psych the prison guards like he did. Granted, Will probably knows alot about horror movies, which definately equipped him to stare down murderers and all sorts of other maniacs.

Also, to back track for a minute, why did he run into the woods? Did he seek Mortiis? Oh no wait, let me back track even further. Why would he steal a cab? Wait, I know he thinks he is the best hunter in the bronx, but obviously he didn't fly to europe with his knife. I wonder if he has a locker somewhere in europe with his back up belt, knife and NYDM vest.

You better watch out what you say. He might find out who you are after he "gets your info" with his new Polish prison connections. Afterall, they have to help him. He is 1/26th Polish you know.

I could become enemy number one in the eyes of NYDM. Next thing I know a row of PT cruisers might block off Ernest ave and Rahmer will psych out Marsi to give up my where abouts and then they will murder all my co-workers and burn walgreens to the ground.

Great story, but I think Will may be insane.

you own man, i bet you could fight like 20 werewolves.

read that out loud in "classic wrestler." good times await.

I'm glad Will is okay and back in the USA. However, did anyone else feel the story was a bit glamourized?

I FORGOT TO MENTION THAT WHEN I WAS IN PRISON I WAS THRUST INTO A LIFE OR DEATH HAND TO HAND COMBAT TOURNAMENT WHERE I FACED IVAN DRAGO AND LUDVIG BORGA IN A HANDICAP MATCH AND I BEAT BOTH OF THOSE PUSSIES WITH ONLY MY LEFT HAND AFTER THE FAGGOT GUARDS SHOT ME IN THE RIGHT ARM AND LEFT LEG.

I rest my case.

DrinkHardThrashHard said:

He just seems extremely pissed off to me. The glamorous aspect of this comes from that.

3-15-15-3-8 said:

I thought Maddox said that?

"I'M NOT THE PERSON YOU WANT TO BE FUCKING WITH NOWADAYS CAUSE I REALLY DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT DOING WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO PROTECT MYSELF,FAMILY,WOMAN AND MY N.Y.D.M. BROTHERS AND SISTERS"

Reading that makes me wish Will would star in a series of action movies

WILL RAHMER said:


hahahaha

I think I would be more excited to be out of prison than what people say about me on the internet

slowlypeelingtheflesh said:

Thats why you will never be president of the United States of Death metal. At best, maybe you can be the intern who sucks dicks.

menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:



Actually, he had a lot more Polish in him when he was in jail.

hahahaha

menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:

http://www.metalunderground.com/news/details.cfm?newsid=17394

will rahmer aka batman all 5 foot 2 inches of him!

DON'T MESS WITH ME WOMAN OR i'LL STAB YOU AN RUN INTO THE WOODS YALL CAN'T BREAK ME I LAUGH AT YOU WOMAN! i'M NYDM CAN'T BREAK ME YALL UGH BRUTAL!

I heard that Roger and the drum machine are considering kicking Will out of the band and replacing him with a vibrator.

i'M 4 FOOT NINE i TOOK OUT THE WHOLE POLISH PRISON INMATES GUARDS WARDEN AND WOMAN YALL COULD NOT BREAK ME. i THEN ECAPED THE PRISON SWAM ACROSS THE OCEAN IN EUROPE BACK TO THE U.S.

WILL RAHMER said:

you gotta love erotic fanfiction

I ONLY HAD 1 INCIDENT WITH SOME PRISONERS WHO TURNED OUT TO BE SOME OF THE horniest men I EVER ENCOUNTERED(I LOVE HOW IT HAS TO TAKE 5-10 IDIOTS TO TRY TO GET ME-it normally only takes one if he's cute)-BUT ANYWAY THEY FAILED, and I made them go one at a time, just like everybody else.THE PIECES OF SHIT PRISON GUARDS FAILED TO BREAK ME-I REVERSED THEIR WHOLE MENTAL TORTURE SHIT ON THEM AND TAUNTED THE HELL OUT OF SOME OF THEM, by stripping down to my vest and shaking my ass for them.

This guy has a reputation for getting in fights and trouble with the law. After so many incidents you have to wonder who is really starting the trouble? True tough guys don't look for trouble. Any good martial arts teacher will say that at first you should look to avoid the fight, not back down but stay away from troublesome people and places. Clearly this guy hasn't learned that which is sad especially at his age.

WILL RAHMER said:

ha!

I am very sad.

POLISH ANAL <3

NYDM Guy said:


You'd think that he would after an incident like this.

NYDM Guy said:

HOW DARE you i charge you with nydm treson woman! I'll break you!

The cab driver was a chick?

powerkok said:

yes she was a chick so what, I only start fights with woman cause there the same height as me. I'll break you kok i'll start a fight with you than run off into the woods!

powerkok said:

Yes, it was a cat fight.

I heard that Will caught the Polish version of AIDS, which makes you healthy instead of making you sick.

menstrual_sweatpants_disco said:

No. He'll do the raping himself.
You see, he's not the type of person you want to be fucking with these days. You better have eyes on the back of your head, because Will likes fucking men up their arses, almost as much as he likes taking it up his arse, and we all know how much Will likes that.

right well...mortician rules, and will is god in my book...this is one of the most entertaining posts i have ever read. i am glad he is back, because the day mortician or rahmer stop putting out cd's with such amazing lyrics and music, ALbum after album...i may aswell kill myself...i dont understand how people can look down at this dude...there is so much enjoyment souly by the existance of the man and his band. its like a real life comic/cartoon character. satan bless him.

davefromthegrave said:
This guy is pretty much one of the coolest motherfuckers alive

"You are the ones who are the ball lickers..."

You must be pretty fucking stupid to proclaim will rahmer a god.

If my favorite band breaks up I will straight up stab myself in the face, you heard it here folks.

AS FAR AS THESE FUCKING PUSSY-MOTHERFUCKING truth-TALKING FAGGOTS ON BLABBERMOUTH.COM WHO THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO GET RAPED,BEAT OR LEFT TO ROT OVER THERE-it's as if you were a fly on the wall of my cell-YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN THE ONES WALKING AROUND IN DRESSES AND SUCKING DICK especially, if you were my cell mate-YOU CLAIM TO KNOW SO MUCH ABOUT THE JAIL OVER THERE? WELL GUESS WHAT ASSHOLES-I ENDED UP MAKING ALOT OF CONNECTIONS OVER THERE DUE TO ME BEING PART POLISH AND UKRANIAN ON TOP OF BEING homosexual

Will, congratulations on your pregnancy.
Despite the the fact that I am insanely jealous, I hope your first child is a maculine child.
Who's the father?